Monday

Hello I'll first start by saying how much I love your forum. And the fact that you take your time out to give wise advice to people that need it. It is very much appreciated especially by me. My boyfriend has a friend who is in a relationship with his brother who is married but his wife is out of town. This girl who is my boyfriend's friend is also in a relationship with her boyfriend who is also out of town. My boyfriend’s friend and his brother hook up and start sleeping together. Long story short they end the relationship and the girl, my boyfriend’s friend start blaming my boyfriend for letting his brother take advantage of her. She's trying not to let her boyfriend find out that she cheated but yet she blames my boyfriend continuously and went ahead to tell him she'll hurt him. Couple of days ago I get a call on my phone of a lady accusing me that I'm involved with her husband and she's cursing me out, I was confused so I hung up only to find out later on that it was my boyfriend's friend. My boyfriend says not to call her back, he apologized to me I have a feeling she's not gonna stop at just that and I don't want to be the one she hurts to get back at him (my boyfriend) What do I do I'm really trying to stay away from the whole situation and be calm about it

Hey! Thank you for your kind words, I really appreciate you! Wow, this one is loaded. Your boyfriend is so much involved. His brother and his close girl friend? This is sticky and messy and I’m sorry that you’re caught up in it. I’m not sure what this woman is capable of but obviously something is off when she’s taking matters out on you. It sounds like she’s upset with the brother and is taking it out on your boyfriend by trying to hurt you. So what can you do? Well I’m assuming that since she is your boyfriends close friend that you and her might be sort of close as well…she has your phone number, knows where you live most likely, and is probably following you on social media. I don’t know the history of your relationship but she doesn’t sound like someone you want to keep around. I don’t want to jump the gun but from the little information you gave about her she doesn’t seem like a trustworthy person. Trust is one of the fundamentals in any relationship so I’m not seeing this relationship to be salvageable. I think that your decision to stay out of it is a good one. What you don’t want to do is escalate the situation or provoke her. This didn’t have anything to do with you in the beginning and it shouldn’t now. I think the best thing to do would be to let your boyfriend and his brother handle it. And honestly, maybe the brother has done enough! He may not be the best person to talk with her…so it sucks but since your boyfriend is her friend, he might be the best person to talk to her. It’s their mess not yours. Your boyfriend should meet with his friend and talk to her. He should let her know that he knows she's hurt and that he agrees that it's a messed up situation. If he could sort of acknowledge her pain and relate with her that might help her to listen to what he has to say when he tells her to leave you out of it. It was her choice to cheat on her boyfriend with a married man and she has no right to take that out on you. Keep in mind that if she continues to harass you, you can BLOCK her or unfollow her on your social media, block her from calling your phone, e-mail too if you have to. Goodness gracious this is a tough, annoying,and frustrating situation...I hope these tips help!

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